My Dream Girls

My ex-wife was crazy wet for black guys. I know she was because I over heard her talking with her friends. They were all drunk and talking loudly. She thought I was asleep upstairs. She told them about a black guy who fucked her, and how it was the best feeling, and how huge his cock was.

The next time we had sex, I asked her if she liked black guys, or had been with one, or dreamed about it. She said, “No. No. No.” I was so disappointed. I wish she’d been honest. I’m sure she cheated with a young black stud she worked with. I wish she’d have shared the details with me.

I love the luck on this woman’s face in the picture. My fantasy is that she’s my girlfriend, she sucks him off too, and she’s desperate to hook up with him and feel his cock inside her.

Any women out there who have had that experience or fantasy? Please, please, please share.

high heels to be spoilt for choice

oh, at least going online again! really missed my webcamchats, so looking forwards it right now tonight …  so what about some latex tonight? and high heels of course, though you have to admit, it is not that easy to choose! the real reason for beeing spoilt for choice is, that I do not have enough shoes I think. to make it easier for me I decided it would be one pair of the first high heel shelf you see here… or may be a pair from the second one… or one pair of the third

Top Go Go Putt Putt

As I’ve mentioned previously, we’ve recently plugged the TV back into the feeding tubes. It’s definitely had me thinking about the entertainments I blow time on, and a post earlier today by Warren Ellis - regarding the BBC show Top Gear - reminded me of a thought I wanted to follow through.

First though, Ellis’ statement:

Does it not bother anyone that the most beautifully and ambitiously shot (and soundtracked) programme on BBC television is in fact TOP GEAR? – more

He later adds that he’s a fan of the show, and I should mention that I am as well, but I shouldn’t be. I’m not a big car guy – sure, cars are a neat technology that I appreciate for getting me places, but I couldn’t identify 95% of the cars I pass on the road, nor do I spend Friday nights watching Cannonball Run. Still, if I pass an episode of Top Gear while flipping through the guide, I can’t help but stop.

Why?

First a sample to demonstrate:

It’s a four wheeled box, but how can you not take on Jeremy Clarkson’s enthusiasm?

More importantly though: the huge industrial set (watch for the wrecked truck in the background), the kinetic camera movement and editing, the soundtrack, and of course the ridiculously expensive, high speed appliances – everything on the show feels crafted to the hilt – it’s design fetishism, top to bottom. On its greatest days, Top Gear is entirely made up of the slick fluidity that emanates from the machines it demonstrates.

Health and safety

It’s been an annoying few days on the captivated man front. The day before our wedding anniversary I discovered that the side of my left testicle was becoming chaffed. It’s just a small area that’s rubbing on something, but it is painful. I think that what is happening is that the CB 6000 is both squeezing the “boys” outwards and also tending to drag things down. The result is that the edge of one of the “chaps” is chaffing on the fabric of my trousers.

Normally, I like to wear fairly loose fitting underpants but this, I think, is contributing to the problem as the package is pretty free moving. I suspect the solution is to hold everything under much tighter control with a jockstrap arrangement.

I had a rummage through the underwear drawer and unearthed a ridiculous “posing pouch” that had been given to me as a joke present by a friend years ago. Testing this out, it certainly seems to work well and hold everything more firmly up and tighter in to the body. It would do the trick but for the fact that it is bright, day-glow orange. It makes me look like my genitals have been tangoed.  Anyway, I’m in the market for some new undergarments.

Unfortunately, the chaffed area is still there so I have, reluctantly and with C’s agreement, had to refrain from wearing the CB until it heals up.

We had a splendid anniversary: a delicious meal and, with the youngling at his friends, a very pleasant, grown-up evening. C accepted the key so she is now officially the keyholder even if I am on temporary medical reprieve. I would have rather liked it if she could have worn it around her neck as a reminder to me (and she may occasionally do this) but her job makes it impossible on a full-time basis.

The zenith of the day was release for me after ten days of denial. I honestly don’t think I have ever had an orgasm like it. Usually an orgasm, for me, is a rhythmic affair, a pulsatile pleasure. This was more like firing a semen bullet, an intense ejaculation that was like a spike of pure ecstasy shooting up my spine. I was inside C when I came but, had I been “free” I suspect it would have shot across the room and knocked the table lamp over. The next time a hand job is in the offing I think I’m going to have to warn her to wear goggles or risk losing an eye.

THE FOOT MASSEUSE

Jane takes off her shoe, places it on my face and makes me kiss and smell the insides of her shoe. She presses it with her foot. “Inhale! Inhale hard! Smell my shoe!” She commands. So I inhale and smell as I go crazy with the smell of her shoe. Then she pushs the shoe away and puts her soles in front of my face. “Do you like that?” She asks. “Yes Jane, you know I do.” I tell her as she giggles. She rubs her sole on my cheeks, face and then teases me. She puts her instep on my face and says, “Kiss it. Hold my foot and keep on kissin it!”

“Yes Jane.”

“Miss Jane!” She reminds me.

After a few seconds, she takes her foot away and tells me, “Come on! Kiss it some more, you stupid dirty old man!” I try to kiss it, but she has her other shoe on my chest. I can’t reach it, so she and Ana giggle at my predicament. Then Jane suddenly puts her foot on my nose and presses against it. She takes it away again and teases me by swaying her foot over my face and laughing. Then she suddenly puts her toes on my nose and presses them down. With a commanding voice she says, “Smell them!” I smell for all I am worth. “Do you like the smell of my feet?” “Yes Miss Jane.” “Well here! Smell both of my feet!” She then takes off her other shoe and places both of her feet on my face, pressing down while I inhale the sweet fragrance of her feet that had just come from her high heeled shoes.

I cum in no time. After resting for 20 minutes, it is now Ana’s turn to do the same things as Jane is the one to jerk me off. Ana, who is 23, makes me kneel first on the floor while she sits on my bed and makes me kiss and smell her shoes. All the while she teases me and tells me to jerk myself off. “Like the smell of my shoe?” “Yes Miss Ana.” “Lick the shoe, too!” “Yes Miss Ana” Then she slowly holds my hair and removes part of her shoe while making me smell her foot which is still inside of her shoe. I almost cum again. As I mentioned, it is the smell of the shoe, sock and feet that turn me on the most. “Smell little puppy,” she tells me as she forces my face inside of her shoe. “Yes Miss Ana.” As I get aroused, Ana lets go and commands, “Lie here on the bed!” As soon as I lay on my back, Jane jerks me off while Ana does her thing with her feet.

That’s the way my scenario goes with these pretty masseuses. I have 6 masseuses to choose from. Sometimes I get one. Sometimes two. This has been going on for 2 years now. I hope you like my story.

10 Crazy Things I Want To Do Before I'm 35

Finally, a fucked up list compiled by S.D. alphabetically and numerically ordered of the ten crazy things I want to do before I’m 35 years old.

1. Tip over an outhouse while a nun is inside changing her tampon
2. Dump a full garbage can on an occupied baby carriage
3. Road rage on a limo with an uzi and a grenade launcher while blindfolded
4. Wash my balls in holy water
5. Take a shit in poison ivy while gargling baking soda for a middle school science project
6. Fulfill a a centegenarian’s last deathbed wish by fucking the piss out of her with a broom and dustpan
7. Eat raw roadkill
8. Get a tattoo of two guys screwing just below my navel
9. Make a special appearance on Jon & Kate Plus Eight where I’m Kate’s new boyfriend and I have a fetish of masturbating everytime Jon walks in the door
10. Do jumping jacks while eating Apple Jacks and playing jacks inside a jack-o’-lantern

Don't worry, I'll lead the way.